Fingering is a word we are all familiar with, and many have engaged in the act.
But how much do we know about it? What are the fundamentals of it? Do people enjoy it? How do you do know you’re doing it well? These intimate questions will be covered in this article.
What Is Fingering?
Fingering is when a person uses their fingers to stimulate another person’s genitals.
Although many think of the vagina when they hear the term ‘fingering’ some people enjoy anal fingering as it has many nerve endings, and therefore carries a pleasant feeling.
However, this article will be covering aspects to do with vaginal fingering.
This intimate act can be used as foreplay, or be used as a complete sexual encounter. Fingering the vagina can also stimulate the clitoris, which is the most sensitive area of the vagina, and can help individuals reach orgasm.
This can be done by stimulating the G-spot. It is said that reaching the G-spot via the fingers is easier than through penetration with a penis.
What Does It Feel Like?
It is hard to come up with a definition of what this sexual act feels like. The fact that It is an important feature in female pleasure, and can lead to orgasm if done well, should give you a good idea though.
There are many women who struggle to reach orgasm through penetration of the penis alone, many need some clitoris stimulation and this is where fingering is important.
A 2017 study found that only around 18% of women can reach orgasm through penis penetration. A lot of the time, clitoral stimulation is needed when it comes to orgasming during sex.
Through fingering, it is possible to have access to the Grafenberg spot, commonly known as the G-spot. This vaginal G-spot is located inside the vagina. It was established by Dr. Beverly Whipple.
She found that adopting a ‘come here’ motion with fingers inside the vagina could stimulate the G-spot which in turn leads to an orgasm.
The G-spot is actually a part of your clitoral network, so when the G-spot is being stimulated, a part of the clitoris is being stimulated too.
The clitoris has 8,000 nerve endings, which is over double the amount the penis has.
Knowing how many nerve endings there are in the clitoris, and how a good technique can lead to an orgasm, it’s safe to say that fingering feels pretty good (if done correctly, this cannot be stressed enough!).
Tips Tricks And How To Make It Better
The important thing to remember is that every woman is unique, as is their vagina, so it is not one size fits all.
What works for some, may not work for others, and an important part of intimacy and sexual contact is discovering what each other’s likes and desires are
It is also important to have fun while exploring what your partner enjoys. Their body language will tell you what’s working and what isn’t, and communicating verbally what you like and don’t like is always a good way forward!
Tips Before Getting Started
Before engaging in this wonderfully intimate act, there are a few things to be mindful of. One of those is ensuring your fingernails have been cut.
This will reduce any chance of infection, and avoid any unwanted accidents. With this in mind, it is important to be gentle in your approach and take it easy.
It’s normal to get excited, but being too rough can lead to feelings of discomfort, and in severe cases, unwanted accidents. Fingers are great tools sexually as they are strong and agile, but it’s essential to not get too carried away, especially at the start.
Another important tip is the use of extra lubrication. Not everyone requires or wants to use lube, as they may have enough natural lubrication produced by their body.
However, some vaginas lack slightly in this area and may need an extra hand to make the experience more enjoyable. Some people may just enjoy the extra lubrication, and when used, is a bonus.
As mentioned earlier, the clitoris is the most sensitive part of the vagina, with 8,000 nerve endings. Hearing that may make you only want to pay attention to this section.
However, the rest of the vagina should not be ignored. If you go in intensely on just the clitoris, it could have the opposite effect of what you want, shocking it a little.
It’s important to have your partner feeling relaxed and aroused, and you can do this by massaging other areas of the vagina before getting to work on the clitoris.
The areas to target are
- Inner labia
- Outer labia,
- Vaginal opening,
- The perineum, just below the vaginal opening.
All these areas are sensitive to touch, so working on a few of these is a good way to begin. Remember to listen to any verbal or physical feedback from your partner.
Getting Started
One of the most important things to remember is the need for starting slow. Even if someone enjoys a bit of rough play, a build-up is always needed.
Begin slowly by massaging and stimulating different parts of the vagina, it’s a marathon, not a sprint. If you want to begin arousal slowly, a good tip would be to start by caressing areas around the vagina that are close by, such as the lower stomach, the thighs, and the two areas that join the vagina to the thighs. By building up arousal, there is also the chance of natural fluids building up more.
This can also be a form of teasing, which can increase the overall pleasure of the experience.
Time For The Clitoris
Once you are confident your partner is turned on and comfortable, it’s a good time to begin stimulating the clitoris at this point. Since you’ve spent some time warming up around the vagina, stimulation of this very spot should be welcomed.
When paying attention to this area, it is best to start gently and remember, it’s not a DJ booth. Try different patterns such as circular motions, going back and forth, or even light tapping.
How To Find The G-spot
Finding the famous G-spot can be hard, as every human body is different. The best way is through self-exploration or the exploration of your partner. Using fingers or a toy, slowly begin by inserting them in the opening of the vagina.
Once you or your partner are comfortable, lift upwards towards the belly button, adopting a ‘come here’ motion. Repeat this motion, and pay attention to what feels right in either yourself or your partner.
The walls of the vaginal canal are generally quite smooth in texture, whereas the G-spot can feel like a wet sponge, so be aware of feeling this if you are trying to reach this spot.
Preferences will vary from person to person, and not all women will be satisfied with stimulation of the G-spot and that is perfectly fine.
Incorporating Toys
A way of improving this intimate act is by including the use of a sex toy.
There are countless numbers of toys you can use, but when it comes to fingering, bullet vibrators or finger vibrators are quite popular. A finger vibrator hooks onto your index finger and can be worn by men or women.
They work well when fingering as it is lodged on the finger, so it allows for stimulation of the clitoris at the same time as stimulating other parts of the vagina.
Vibrators can also help with vaginal dryness and can aid in producing natural lubrication.
Be Attentive
When engaging in any sexual activity, different people like different things.
It is very important to be attentive with your partner, whether that is by having an honest conversation about what you both like, or by listening to their cues during physical activity.
Your partner will let you know when they like what you are doing, and you will also be able to tell when they do not.
Final Thoughts
To conclude, it is safe to say that fingering does feel good when done well. It is an intimate act that can be done as a wholesome sexual activity in itself or a useful form of foreplay.
It is an enjoyable activity that has many benefits such as increasing arousal in your partner before engaging in intercourse or achieving orgasm in itself.
The added bonuses are that It is also a safe way of engaging in sexual activity as there is no risk of pregnancy involved, and fewer chances of spreading some STDs.
