Some products just get off on the wrong foot with you straight away. The Pink B.O.B Ryder is one such vibrator. I was sent this vibrator by the great people at Too Timid for review and my first impressions upon seeing the Pink B.O.B Ryder was why do they even make vibrators like this anymore?

I rarely write a completely negative review, there is usually something about a product I like. But there are just so many things I dislike about the Pink B.O.B Ryder I can’t see a single silver lining. So, let’s begin this tale of woe.

Unsealed Packaging

The first thing to worry me about the Pink B.O.B Ryder is the packaging. Strange you may think but it comes in a plastic card like would hang on a spigot. Nothing wrong with that at all, except the card isn’t sealed. I pop the card open and there are no staples or seal to stop me. I’m immediately aware this means the toy isn’t security sealed in any way and could well have been opened and handled. This icks me out a bit.

In appearance the Pink B.O.B Ryder is quite dated. It’s a cylindrical phallic style vibrator, the kind my mum had in flesh tone when I was a child. Now I’m all for a bit of retro so I try not to judge the Pink B.O.B Ryder harshly on its vintage look. It could be shit hot at getting me off.

Battery Operated

I’m not even slightly surprised to find out the Pink B.O.B Ryder is battery operated. Unscrewing the bottom, I can see the batteries slide into the body of the vibe. Batteries are not included, and you will require 2 AA’s before you can play.

The bottom of the Pink B.O.B Ryder is also where the controls sit. Just like the vibes of yesteryear the Ryder is operated by a dial on the base of the shaft. This makes it very hard to work out a scale of intensities available. It’s difficult to find the setting which was working for you before. Especially as you must turn the dial back to zero to switch the Ryder off.

Metallic Shaft

The shaft of the Pink B.O.B Ryder is metallic plastic in nature. A silver colour and polished up nicely to quite a reflective finish. The base is made of black plastic. All round the appearance is uninspiring. I felt a bit like the 80’s might call at any moment to ask for their vibrator back. Again though, you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover and maybe the Pink B.O.B Ryder has hidden depths.

Alas no, it doesn’t. The vibrations are so weak, even on a high setting. They’re shallow and distributed across the entire shaft. If only they worked as well on my clit as they do my hand. The best way to describe them is buzzy, no rumble or depth at all. I can usually cum with a bit of assistance but the Pink B.O.B Ryder just couldn’t get me there.

Weak Vibrations

Despite the shape of the shaft tip being perfect for nestling against the side of my clit the buzzy vibrations became more irritating than arousing and eventually the frustration got the better of me and I swapped to something I knew would get me there.

Maybe it’ll be better internally. After all the Pink B.O.B Ryder boasts of 7-inch length on the card it came on. This is total length. 6 inches of the Pink B.O.B Ryder are insertable with a circumference of 3.5 inches. I wasn’t filled with enthusiasm about the possibility of the Ryder rocking my world internally. But I could be wrong…

Frustration

No, I wasn’t wrong. The shiny surface of the Ryder slides inside me easily even without lube and there’s absolutely no friction to grab or stimulate at all. The lack of width means I’m left uninspired by penetration with the Pink B.O.B Ryder too.

It can achieve a good depth of penetration, but the vibrations are so weak they’re pointless internally and it’s nowhere near big enough to satisfy me without something going on. Eventually I just gave up. It was frustration personified.

Battery Operated Boyfriend

Another concern I have with the Pink B.O.B Ryder is on the tip of the shaft is a kind of dimple in the plastic coating. When I first opened the Ryder, I was sat playing with it in my hands while discussing it with my playmate and noticed a rough point under my fingers. When I looked this dimple had a raised plastic bit which was quite sharp. So, I can’t even say the Ryder is well made.

Add this to my untold irritation at the brand name. I hate the phrase Battery Operated Boyfriend. It’s not very inclusive, not everyone using a vibrator has or wants a boyfriend. It buys into the belief that sex toys replace your partner which many men already think. And honestly this is 2018 if we are still using coded phrases for the word vibrator then we might as well give up. I know it’s just a brand name, but it’s badly thought out. The words “Battery Operated Boyfriend “are emblazoned up the side of the packaging card.

In Summary

Too Timid sell the Pink B.O.B Ryder for $19.95 which does go some way to explain how bad it is as with sex toys as with anything in life you get what you pay for. I wouldn’t recommend the Pink B.O.B Ryder vibrator to anyone, not even as a first vibrator. There are just too many issues with it.

Thank you so much to the great people at Too Timid for sending me the Pink B.O.B Ryder for review. I was sent this product free of charge and in exchange for an honest and impartial review.

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