As a self-confessed cosmetic junkie, a huge part of getting ready for a date or play session is putting on my make-up. I spend hours perfecting my look, blending multi shades of shadow till I’m happy. Lining my eyes becomes like a surgical procedure to get the most symmetrical effect possible. So, you can imagine my confusion when I’m told how sexy I look AFTER the event. Once my lipstick is smudged across my face and my mascara is bleeding down my face.
This blog only exists after a conversation with a male follower who I’ve known for a while. After watching The End of the Fxxxing World my mascara was creating inky rivers down my face. And I tweeted as much. When I was met with the usual “pics or it didn’t happen” response, it sparked a conversation about how this look turns some people on.
Sex Proof Cosmetics
It’s a strange coincidence that cosmetics manufacturers market their products based on them being immovable. I’ve even got mascara branded as “Sex Proof”. But there is no doubt I’ve noticed it too. I’ve been told after play sessions how hot I look. Yet when I meet my reflection I’m stunned to find two inches of smudged black under my eyes and smears of red across my lips, hair dishevelled. What about this is appealing?
Is it undoing the perfection I’ve created? Literally ruining me. Or is it more about your own sexual prowess reflected in the mess you’ve created. The more of a state I look the better job you must have done.
Maybe it’s simply because primped perfection isn’t sexy. Too polished a look suggests you’re untouchable. And almost like newly fallen snow the temptation is to run across it and ruin it.
Sometimes this ties into a form of fetish, Dacryphilia. This is when a person is aroused by emotional distress in a partner. Usually this manifests as a form of D/s. In a BDSM relationship this can be achieved by torture, humiliation or pain. But Dacryphilia isn’t limited to BDSM couples. Some vanilla partners may find it arousing when a loved one cries at a film or song, or even due to strong emotional ties during sex.
I’ve cried during extremely intense play and I know my ex found it very exciting to incite such a strong reaction from me. This becomes tied into the way I look. He would often tell me how beautiful I looked when my mascara would pour down my face as I forced his cock into my throat. My eyes watering as I struggled to get him deeper with every thrust.
The mascara stained face becomes almost proof of how much I want to pleasure him, despite the hours spent making my face up. I was happy to destroy it for him.
Reducing Her to a Mess
Tweeting about this blog the subject was met with much male approval. And female agreement. Almost everyone who responded mentioned how their partner also enjoyed this look. It seems the messy, bedraggled look awakens something deep in the male psyche.
There are total submissive elements to the fucked up make up look. It strokes the male pride, “look what you did to her, you’ve literally reduced her to a mess” but I also believe it can be something deeper than that.
I feel from my own experiences that if my make-up is smeared across my face its an indication of something else. It tells him I lost control. For that period of time I was so consumed with pleasure I didn’t care about the mask I wear day to day. I didn’t care about the smudges and the smears. Because the pleasure was more important.
And strangely despite looking in the mirror in dismay, I have to admit there is something sexy to the way I appear after these encounters. My destroyed mask a symbol of the reckless abandon with which we just fucked. Its raw and almost primal. When I discussed this with my playmate he felt the same. Its about the loss of control he creates in me. The fact that I take such care in the way I look and then as soon as he’s inside me I don’t give a fuck.
The fucked-up make-up look must have been absorbed into the subconscious of the population as when I was thinking about this post I realised why I think it looks sexy. It’s just a more exaggerated version of a smoky eye look. This is a favourite look of mine and is a perineal MUA short cut to a sexy, raw look. It’s also a look which has been seen on the catwalk and in high fashion magazines. Is this secretly tapping into that moment after sex? Where intimacy and hormones are at their highest?
Another favourite element when discussing this with Twitter followers was when the effect is created as a result of a grand finale. A money shot to the face. Letting a guy cum on your face is something not everyone is happy to do. Its tied into some deep subjugation and feels to me sometimes like the ultimate Dominance. “Ultimately you are just a cum rag.” After taking a load to the face it’s inevitable there will be a bit of smudging. This is an unintended but highly desirable effect. In essence you’re sullying her, tainting her.
The whole fucked up make up look is something which appears indelibly linked with hot, raw sex, and since putting together this blog I’ve decided to throw away my waterproof mascara.